I heard this recently from someone who had been trying to find help for a distressing problem. But I have heard worse.
He/She:
...tried to get me to buy into his 12 week program before he even knew why I was there.
...talked non-stop about himself.
...told me I needed to turn to Jesus.
...seemed creepy.
...fell asleep while I was talking.
There are some great therapists, but finding them can seem like buying the proverbial pig in a poke.
He/She:
...tried to get me to buy into his 12 week program before he even knew why I was there.
...talked non-stop about himself.
...told me I needed to turn to Jesus.
...seemed creepy.
...fell asleep while I was talking.
There are some great therapists, but finding them can seem like buying the proverbial pig in a poke. When you rely on using insurance, it gets even trickier. That long list of names within ten miles of you tells you nothing at all about how one picked at random will be someone you can trust to actually help.
A therapeutic relationship is built on trust and a personal connection. If you already have that with me, you know my style is investigative in that I try to get as much information as is necessary to find all the puzzle pieces before we can arrange them. It is respectful of you, your problem and the other people involved in your problem. It is solution-focused with a healthy dose of humor. And it is psycho-educational, meaning that I will teach you as much as you can stand of how your brain and behaviors work together so you can meet other problems as they arise in your life (that's cognitive-behavioral therapy).
Those are what you should expect from any therapist. So how do you find a therapist who “fits?”
First, ask the friends you trust for referrals. Most of my clients are referred by previous clients. If you don't have anyone to ask, there are online directories that provide brief descriptions of therapists and their specialties. [But be wary: Licensed professional counselors are prohibited from using testimonials. If you see testimonials in any published form, know that therapist is violating license regulations and you might reasonably wonder what other ethics he disregards.]
Then, call the therapists who have been recommended. They should be able to talk with you for a few minutes by phone before you make an appointment. Do they have experience with your particular problem? Do they have hours that work with your schedule so that you can see them regularly? Do you understand their fees? Then listen to your gut: Do they sound like someone who will treat you and your problems with respect?
It can be difficult to decide that you need help with a problem. The time and money invested in therapy will be far more beneficial than other things you can spend them on.